Saturday, April 28, 2012

Death By Ball Squeezing!

"Seize & Squeeze" Takes on New Deadly Meaning

http://gizmodo.com/5905648/woman-kills-man-squeezing-his-testicles



Balls. Always been a good target in self defense if you can get a hold of 'em.

I've known of testicles being ruptured, battered, and bruised - not to mention ungodly searing pain from getting snapped in the nuts: I'm talking fall straight to the ground, vomit, pull your knees up, while your whole system temporarily crashes or shuts down - the result of good cracks, whacks, smashes, knees and assorted evil "hand jobs."

That said, it's important to understand that SOME MEN pumped on adrenaline and "the fight" CAN withstand direct hits and strikes to the groin without it stopping or seizing them in the moment-- the effects (see above) arriving after the fact. YES, some guys ARE that pumped and just plain gnarly.

But this is the first time I've heard of DEATH resulting from ball squeezing.

Check out the article for possible medical explanation.

And let's not count on it ladies. But in the meantime, and by all means, IF YOUR LIFE OR INTEGRITY IS IN JEOPARDY - Seize and squeeze! 

Monday, April 16, 2012

MORE MINDFULNESS PLEASE!!!

TWO BEEFS ! QUIT IT! (Do I look like I'm joking? ) 





(1) Those in WSD need to stop wielding this awful phrase as your promo: "Don't be a victim!" Or worse: "Choose NOT to be a victim!"

Let's be clear: YES to sensible risk reduction, heightened awareness, early recognition of danger/ testing/ behavioral clues, good body language, intuition turned on (ALL CHECKED). Now THIS: NO woman CHOOSES to be a victim or to be attacked. Even women who "do everything right" - how they comport themselves, how street smart they are; they can be Black Belts and kick ass power feminists-- and STILL be violated or raped. And "not at fault." 

(2) Ditch last century verbiage: Some in Women's Self Defense still promulgate that self defense is about knowing "YOU'RE Worth FIGHTING FOR." That you're worth it.



As one who is steeped in SD and as a former psychotherapist, while I appreciate where this is coming from, I find this comment mildly insulting; the insinuation is that most women DON'T think they're worth fighting for. I disagree. To me this smacks of a victim mentality pinned onto and often attributed to women. 

Sure. It may in fact be relevant for women struggling with DEEP self esteem issues or domestic abuse whereby they've internalized the doubts of their abusers and diminishing self perceptions. But most women today KNOW they're worth fighting for and WANT to protect their bodily sovereignty. They need to learn HOW and how to overcome fear and other inhibitions. 

Let's MOVE the conversation forward- not backward!









PS. Oh yes that's me with fabulous INVESTIGATIVE DISCOVERY TV producer CHRIS G. I was recently interviewed for a forthcoming (this summer) episode for a new show featuring Dates From Hell . (But seriously. These are remarkable real life stories of women's resolve, smarts, fighting hearts and... fighting back powers. 


The episode I was called in for is the amazing Keri Potts, who heroically daringly escaped from a rapist in Rome. A predator not only intent on brutal rape but possible a killer..... Stay tuned and I'll share more.  

Saturday, April 14, 2012

How To Take Down an Oral Rapist-- And NOT Get Hammered

Free Blow Jobs - but not the kind he had in mind.   

{ TRIGGER ALERT - PROCEED WITH CARE. }

This headline infuriated me as many do: 


Thinking about the 18 year-old young woman he raped, sent a sharp then sinking pain into my heart. I know all too well - from working with survivors - the trauma that rape and sexual violence leaves in its wake. How these moments can unravel into months and even years of suffering.   

So I decided to share a fairly simple and wickedly surprising means of striking back in an oral rape, which is common in sexual violence- and more precisely how to NAIL this motherfucker.(It's a question I've been asked often.)  First let me say there isn't just one way-- self defense is never a cookie-cutter or one size fits all. No one technique will always work. In this case where the rapist is wielding a hammer threatening to beat women who don't "get him off" there's a few options in terms of fight-back-to-escape strategies. It's never (rarely) easy, but victory is never cheap. (And no I'm not talking about biting his dick; dicey at best.) 

With training you can learn how to wrap and trap his weapon-wielding arm then instantly move in to attack his face/ his throat/ his eyes bringing your best in-fighting tools to bear: elbows / palms/ hammerfists or stabbing, smashing, or punching hand strikes. Or you could capture his arm and drive rapid knee strikes into his nether regions or whomping kicks aimed at disabling his mobility (lower limb destruction).THEN you could slam him down, throw him away and escape seizing the hammer on your way out. Ta-dah! 

For added panache, imagine flashing him your best Thelma & Louise look of disgust, then casting your eyes his way one last time (so you can give details to the cops) fixing your gaze on his now shriveling manhood while muttering aloud: 


"Pffft! Dude, you call that a tool?" (You get the idea...) 

The story of the 51 year old Portland Oregon woman who was attacked by a man wielding a claw hammer comes to mind. She not only wrested the weapon away from him in a life and death struggle, she then killed him with her bare hands, strangled him to death on her kitchen floor. Good thing 'cause he wasn't just a home invader but a HIT MAN who'd been hired by her estranged hubby, sent to KILL HER. (Talk about reversals!) 

But for now we'll bypass assorted strikes - which, by the way, can have different effects on different bodies depending on myriad variables; from the individual's state of mind and blood alcohol level, to how buff or tough he is-- and we'll stick to a mechanically easier solution with concussive head-banging impact for Mr. Jack Hammer- assuming it all goes as planned. (Note: He's only 150 pounds of punk.)  

Before we get going you must PROMISE me that you would ONLY do this if and when you have the MORAL AUTHORITY  to do so and are under attack. It 's not a technique to employ on your ex or current (boyfriend/ hubby) cause you can't stand him no more. OK? 

One more thing: Sexual sacrifice is a lousy option no woman should have to face. That said, what's most important here is being prepared with the OPTION to fight back. 

Now let's get cracking and NAIL Jack Hammer.  

Let me preface this by saying that we're going to FEIGN COMPLIANCE and insert ourselves into HIS plan then employ a grand reversal: 

(1) Note exactly where that hammer is - which he'll soon forget about - then slowly PROCEED to your knees, assume the position he expects and encourage him to step real close so you can give it real good. But first, try to negotiate placement: try to persuade him to stand where there is open space behind him and maybe some hard head-banging surface- you'll see why in a minute.

(2) Next, help him undress. That's right: help him undo his stinking pants so that he suspects NADA and so that he gets used to seeing your hands near and on his body-- you'll see why in a minute. (*Cough* If you start to feel a little bit o' puke in the back of your throat, that's OK. You'll get to spit soon. ) Encourage him to lower his pants down to his mid-thigh at least so that his legs are effectively trapped in his pants like a sac. If he resists, tell him in your best lying voice, "Baby  I need lots of room to work my special mojo on you." Once he hears that he'll likely oblige. In effect you are NOW leading his head- as in his mind, his big head, so to speak. 

(3)  Most Important part! From on your knees, a
ct as if to oblige then as soon as his mind starts to float (see yellow above) take your two hands, grab his  ankles  - make this VERY VERY SNAPPY -- and YANK his motherfucking legs toward you from the back of his ankles, YANKING hard and FAST. I said YANK as in one forceful TAKING move. Do not just PULL. I repeat: do NOT pull - that will NOT do. This move is your ticket to freedom.

If all goes well, and it should, this yanking of his ankles TOWARD YOU hard and fast will TAKE HIS BALANCE and he WILL SLAM Back & DOWN onto the hard merciless ground, hopefully banging his (big) ugly head.  But to add OOMPH and make it a REALLY HARD LANDING also do this: AS you grab-to-yank his ankles simultaneously RAM your HEAD into his hip region (or drive your shoulder tackle-style into his knees)  further forcing his loss of balance and SLAM DOWN. 

Understand this: Because you're ON YOUR KNEES you're stable so you can DO BOTH without losing your base. 
  
(4) Faster than you've ever moved in your life, quickly get up, raise your stronger  leg's knee and STOMP DOWN HARD ON HIS BALLS while his privates are splayed. Repeat as needed. Then RUN like your ass is on fire, and depending on where you are and how far you need to go to get to safety, SEIZE that hammer from his hand and IF NEED BE BECAUSE HE'S STILL CONSCIOUS AND IN ATTACK MODE... you know what to do. (Your choice of additional no-nonsense techniques here.)   

Call the cops and don't forget to tell them how YOU feared for your life and what he threatened you with. 

(5) It's time: Spit. Spit. Spit! Let the full emotion out. Expect to feel charged with emotion, expect to shake, to feel terror and / or rage. 

And this: You did it!!! 

You saved yourself from THAT trauma of being sexually violated. Of course there will be residual feelings or fear from this terrifying event but you WILL deal with that with help and loving support.  

Not only that but by saving yourself and NAILING MR. HAMMER, and hopefully cooking his ass, you will have rallied the FIERCE FEMME for ALL WOMANKIND. 

We will ALL thank you. Because In the end, we're ONE BIG HOOD: Womanhood.